What do you call a man with in the middle of the ocean, with no life jacket? Bob.What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, in a pile of leaves? Rustle.What do you call a woman with a cheesy pelvic discharge? Candida.How does a dog, with a cleft palate, let you know that the mailman is here? He goes, “Mark! Mark! Mark!”So, this guy goes to the talent agent, looking for his big break. He takes his dog, introducing him as a dog who can talk.The agent is skeptical, and wants to see the duo in action.The guy asks the dog, “What’s on the outside of a tree?”The dog answers, “Bark!”“What’s on top of a house”The dog responds, “Roof!”Again, “Who was the greatest baseball player of all time?”The dog considers this, and replies, “Ruth!”The agent has had enough, and chases them both into the street, shouting, “You charlatans! Fakers! Such bullshit! Don’t come back!”The guy seats himself on a bench, disappointed. The dog curls in his lap, hangdog a look on his snout as can be imagined.. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Carol had been in a panic all day. She couldn't understand her inability to step in and stop her children from committing the heinous act of incest yesterday, and then had gotten off to two great orgasms, just thinking about it.She tried to devote her mind into her work, but it continued to wonder back to yesterday afternoon."Are you okay, Carol? You've seemed distracted all day." She turned to see Harold, one of her co-workers, standing next to her. He was probably the last person she wanted to talk to. He was usually vulgar or rude, and she knew that he liked her. Truth was he wasn't her type. Problem was she was beginning to fear her only type was Adam."Yeah," she told him off-handedly, "Just some issues at home. Nothing major." But it WAS something major."Don't you wish families were as easy to figure out as chemicals? I mean, in a way, they control everything about us."Carol froze. Could it be.
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